I survived another one of those outings with all my DH's friends wives. You know the ladies who all have children and whose conversation all evening is 95% children-related. Yes, fun for me as always, so much for me to contribute. Really it annoys me but at the same time encourages me to think about how I want to be when I'm a mother. Do I want all my conversational content to revolve around my child; is there nothing else to talk about? Hopefully not.
Bombshell dropped. As I was entering into my third hour at the women's chat table, the guy who was hosting the get-together comes in the house (all the men were outside) and announces that the reason the last couple just left was because the women is pregnant (was feeling sick). I was surprised the women's table was so quiet. Weird. Isn't this what they look most forward to - a pregnancy announcement?? Were they being quiet on my account, I doubt it. I said it was great, and I meant that. The woman who is pregnant is a really nice person, who I don't know well but hope to.
Honestly though some dread did go through my heart when I heard the announcement. The 'everyone but me' feeling. It can really take a toll on you, but I kept it together and I am proud of myself. I don't want to tarnish anyone else's happiness. They aren't trying to make me feel bad, I know this. And its their baby, not one they are taking away from me. I want mine. I wish I could lay low from all social engagements while all this IVF is going on, but that is difficult. Next hurdle is my niece's birthday party next weekend, where my sister-n-law's relatives who have no couth about asking me if I'm pregnant will be there. Sorry, but for the sake of self-preservation I will be doing some major hiding out at that party.
Timeline update: four days until first ultrasound and bloodwork to determine if I'm supressed
It's been a long time! Part 2
12 years ago
It's a shame they won't let us use Valium and other mood altering drugs while in the midst of a cycle for engagements like these!
ReplyDeleteI vote for telling the sister-in laws relatives something obnoxious so they don't pester you!!! :)
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what you mean. I had dinner with my husband's fellow coaches and their significant others and women were at one end of the table and men at the other. Thankfully, I was in the middle. All the women talked about was their kids and their cleaning secrets. Seriously? The men talked about sports and other cool stuff. I talked to them and felt sad for women who were only defined by their ability to clean things well or have children.
ReplyDeleteI hope these next few days fly by for you while you are waiting for your u/s.
you did amazing! I always hated that friends seemed to walk on eggshells around me... I might be jealous, but I was often happy for the new pregnancy (unless it was a snotty nosed 15 year old.....then I was just bitter!). I hope the blood work and ultrasound go well, and good luck at the party! Use your combat stealth skills!
ReplyDeleteThanks ladies. Your encouragement and just getting what I mean -- means the world to me : )
ReplyDelete